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What’s the story morning glory?

I’m not one of those people who’ve written stories since they were young, and yet…

I could be the poster woman for finding myself in my fifties. No, I wasn’t lost like some £5 note down the back of a sofa, but I had dulled myself down, trying to fit some sort of perfect everything to everyone stereotype.

What was so magical about turning fifty? My daughter went to University, and I brought an end to my long-term relationship, which gave me time for me… and I indulged it fully.

And while there was some partying (ok, a lot 😉 ), I also studied both formally and informally, read voraciously, did things I’d not tried before, accepted invitations I’d have previously have turned down, and yes… started writing.

And I’ve not stopped since.

Essays, op-ed pieces and blogs on both serious and light-hearted lifestyle topics, as well as fiction – from novel length to flash fiction. The serious topics include narcissism, mental health, psychology, belonging, culture, self-worth, influences from our past and the subconscious brain. I know how to write for varying types of audience, and my writing has been described variously as honest, funny and relatable.

Writer for hire?

I am indeed.

Up till now, I’ve written purely for my own personal enjoyment. And while that will continue to some degree (c’mon, I’m a writer, I couldn’t stop writing if I tried), I’m now taking it seriously.

To read examples of my writing:

For serious topics – this site’s blog and Substack
For light-hearted lifestyle writing – Debs Despatches
For fiction and writing related matters – Fiction Can Be Fun

Get in touch

About

My story

Born and brought up in India, then West Africa, with three generations of my family born in India or (what’s now) Pakistan, I felt at home in a country where I looked different to the majority Asian population, but felt an alien when I returned to the UK, despite looking like the majority white population. During my formative years, I lived with with civil unrest and civil war, and stories of culture, race and religion played an important part in my family history.

A single parent by accident and then active choice, I lived for a few years in a three generation household, navigating a family member’s alcoholism amongst other challenges of family dynamics. At age 50, I ended my long-term relationship and I re-entered the dating world, was treated for Breast Cancer, re-trained, while helping to care for my father in his home with dementia until his death. And last, but far from least, I recently discovered Narcissism in my maternal line.

An NLP Practitioner, with diplomas in Life Coaching, Attachment Theory, Gestalt Therapy, Journal Therapy, Psychology, a postgraduate certificate in Humanistic & Psychodynamic Counselling from London’s Goldsmith University, a Mental Health First Aider & MHFA Trainer, and a life-long sufferer with depression, self-care became far more than a hashtag to me – it provided a framework for living well with depression.

A people watcher and photographer, constantly curious and with a thirst for knowledge and understanding. I read avidly, and totally get Christopher Hitchens professing upon facing terminal cancer how much he would regret the books left unread. A rugby fan, lover of classical cello, jazz saxophone, a tinkly boogie-woogie piano, and bluegrass strings, Booker prize long and shortlists, I day dream about living in Tuscany to distract myself from the physical stuff of getting older. Outside of Himself, the loves of my life are my wise, talented and beautiful daughter, and my gorgeous grandchildren.

A self-confessed study junkie, and while I’m reining it in somewhat, I’ll always be learning.

What I write…

I write on subjects which engage me – but they’re wide-ranging and plentiful, ‘cos that old cliché interested and interesting could have been written for me. I’ve also done a fair bit of living…

I prefer to write with a light touch, but take serious subjects seriously. Proper sources matter, but I write in a manner which is approachable and easy to understand. Sometimes the intention behind my writing is sharing knowledge, learnings and experiences, at others it’s to entertain. But when it’s right, I use a blend of both.

Some topics I write about….

  • Narcissism/NPD
  • Family dynamics & Attachment Theory
  • Grief & Caring for a Parent with Dementia
  • Racism & religion
  • Life in a third world country & boarding school
  • Surviving Breast Cancer
  • Relationships & Mature Dating
  • Psychology, Gestalt Therapy, Counselling, Life Coaching & NLP
  • Mental Health and self-care
  • Photography & writing as therapeutic and mindful practices
  • The absurdities of everyday life

To read examples of my writing:

For serious topics – this site’s blog and Substack
For light-hearted lifestyle writing – Debs Despatches
For fiction and writing related matters – Fiction Can Be Fun

Get in touch