Can you go it alone? Yes, you possibly can. Even without the formal study and training, you could educate yourself via solid hours of reading, you could take the time out to carry out an honest analysis and review of your dating and relationship experience to date, you could examine what role you’ve played in the outcome to date, and – of course – you can decide what you want to change and how to change it. You could even engage a friend to provide you with accountability over those goals and actions you’ve set yourself.
Speaking of friends, is this process something a friend could help you with? Yes, that’s also possible. Especially if your friend has studied not only psychology, coaching and NLP, but also dating and daters. I’m going to have to out myself here as a total geek. While dating, I didn’t always focus on finding my ideal mate, I spent a crazy amount of time talking to fellow daters. I’ve always been curious about people, about the choices they make, about what drives them. I talked to both men and women, and got to know a lot of people without any intention (on either part) to date one another. What I learned was both interesting and informative. And I filed it all away without realising that, one day, I’d have a database of knowledge which would prove valuable.
So, the decision is yours to make. I believe your time is too valuable to waste, so much so that I spent hours writing an entire A-Z of posts based on that very premise. There’s a reason people choose to work with a coach rather than go it alone or with a friend. Coaches have no prior personal investment or involvement in your life and your decisions. They’re not going to kid you ‘cos you’re their friend and they don’t want to hurt or upset you. They’ll ask you questions so you don’t lie to yourself. And that’s before you consider the fact that they’ve spent shedloads of their time and money in study and training to do precisely this.
If you decide you’d like help with the process of getting Relationship Ready and you’d like to work with me, you can choose to work on a self-pacing, session-by-session basis, fitting in with your current life and schedule; or you can choose to work more intensively on my 12-week programme. Details on both options and how to book are on my home page.
If circumstances require that you work alone, I hope you’ll find my blog posts and resources (coming soon) to be helpful on your journey.
© 2022, Debs Carey